Where are the vulcans?

posted on February 3rd, 2011, 1:12 am

"Captain's log, Stardate... Uhh, Tuesday?  Something smells funny on deck four.  I've decided to avoid deck four.  Drank some blue stuff yesterday; tasted like pineapple.  Wore my flip-flops on the bridge this morning.  Ensign Xglork didn't care...  Might wear shorts tomorrow; pants are itchy.  End Log."

I would watch the shit out of that show.

posted on February 3rd, 2011, 2:58 am

would probably be an amazing show, kinda like the office or parks and rec except in space

posted on February 3rd, 2011, 3:26 am

Well, what we do know for sure, is that Risa is obviously "warp-capable" or the feds wouldn't have stopped by.  So, they probably had a working spaceship at some point.

I was going to make another joke about that captain's log, but considering the last couple of TNG films at least, it might actually hold its own.  DS9 already played the broken space-station angle, so we would have to take a 'different' approach:

Lt. Commander Fred, ex dominion war hero, sentenced to disciplinary action on board the laughably deteriorating Excelsior-Class USS Dependable, salvaged and re-purposed from the battle of Wolf 359.  A Miranda Class, the USS Mail-Ship 7, is more than capable of utilizing its impulse drive for several minutes without catching fire.  One of the phasor banks still works, too.  A second Miranda class, Starlight Hotel, possesses enough functioning thrusters to maintain a high orbit, which provides a scenic view to guests of the planet-side resort which has rented out a portion of the saucer-section as novelty suites.  They also keep spare chairs and tables in cargo room 2.

On that particular stardate, the nearest patrol happens to be three Sabers, just a few too many hours out at high warp.  This is not an issue, until *they warp into the system, seemingly out of nowhere.  Spilling his coffee on his shirt, Fred fumbles to sound an alert.  As they approach through the system, heading toward the planet with obvious malevolent intent, Fred and his crew scramble to prepare a defence, including using his transporters to beam up everyone on the planet's surface who happens to be wearing a Starfleet comm badge (hilarious results), since his current crew complement couldn't even skeleton crew the hotel.  So, with a rag-tag, completely random, and in several cases intoxicated crew, Lt Commander Fred knows he only has to buy some time.  Will it be enough?

*:  Any suggestions on "They?"

posted on February 3rd, 2011, 3:40 am

*:  Any suggestions on "They?"

Vogons

those Hyperspace Bypasses don't build themselves...

posted on February 3rd, 2011, 4:51 am

The Federation in Fleet Ops operates a bit like the US in terms of military - there are militia for each state, but they are supposed to stay protecting the planet they belong to. For instance, Risan Defense Forces or some such

I agree with this by and alrge.

Here's how I envision it working.


Starfleet is the generic service.

You have national guard type local defence forces, which are also starfleet, that just operate in the local area. They get mostly older/smaller ships because most of what they do is dealing with piracy and rescue missions, and local patrols. They would be based on older ship models, and homebuilt ones.

You also have non-starfleet local militas on some worlds, these would mostly be newer members that insist on keeping THEIR military as well. The Federation doesnt tell people how to live, if they want to do it that way, fine.

In either case, the Starfleet propper also establishes it's own bases (the same as how the active duty US military has bases scatterd over the US).

Some bases are training and logistical facilties (starfleet academy, utopia planetia) that are traditonal institutions.

Some, such as starbases, are simple power projection. You have strong points for response to a threat.

Past that, I see starfleet as  being three main commands.

Exploration command: the enterprises as an example, these ships are the explorers. They are not normaly tactical assets but more than capable of acting as such.
Tactical command: The part of starfleet that does border patrols, maintains task forces for quick threat response, etc etc.
Logistics command: Gets supplies were they are needed, transports people, etc etc

Tactical command would be the normaly seen part of starfleet. They do garrison duty. They do local patrols. They would be the part of starfleet that gets seen the most.

Logistics command: They would basicly operate freighters, starships acting as cargo/people movers, etc etc and would be a mix of fleet and civ personell.

I would watch the shit out of that show.

Seconded.

Or just have the show be based on some border patrol scoutship.

Captains log: Stardate: today.
Romulan ship came by today, damaged by an ion storm.
They insisted on giving a gift of Romulan Ale.
In interst of diplomacy, we accepted.
Uh, they also tried to weaseal information out of us.
We fed them a pack of BS, got more wine.
Ensign Anderson cant find her clothes.
Amd ensign S'ica is commenting how it is illogical to hold a contest on who can projectile vomet the farthest whilst drinking.
I intend to go to the shuttle pod bay and vomit thru the force field, then order the bay door closed again.
Way I see it, that'll ensure I win.
*voice fades*has anyone seen my pants

posted on February 3rd, 2011, 12:44 pm

If they have a native defence force, I wonder what they ships would look like?

A horga'hn :p


Was that pic lonestar's rv from spaceballs?

posted on February 3rd, 2011, 5:27 pm

Horga'hn shaped warships? Even the Borg would probably raise an eyebrow at that sight...

Looks like Lone Starrs 'Millenium RV'.