Ok i got one map made for me but now i want to make my own but the map editor is very confusing here are my main questions.
1: how do i make the map an 8 player map?
2: how do i make start locations
3: how do i turn on the grid for alignment purposes
4: how do i give the map to other people on my network?

any help would be appreciated also if anyone has a list of commands for the editor i would appreciate it

1) A map always is a 8 player map. tto make a map with less then 8 players go into the options dialog in the map editor (pressing ctrl+r while pointing on empty space) and set the unwanted teams to empty
2) As eufnoc mentioned, you will have to place "pins". you can place them by holding the alt button down and leftclick with your mouse where you want them. Then doubleclick on one to change it's name.
3) Yep, you can reenable the grid by pressing alt+g. you can also do so in skirmish or anywhere else.
4) if you host a game with a map your opponents do not have, it will automaticaly transfered to them. if this should fail you can copy the files with the name of the map from your BZN directory to the BZN directory of your friends.